Healing, Pain and Rebirth
It feels like I just wrote this yesterday! But so much can change so quickly, too. I can feel the pace shifting and picking up lately, and wonder if you all are feeling it, too!
On March 7th, I began doing ancestral healing work, which was initiated with the ceremonial, “Are you ready??” from Spirit. For the astrology lovers, it started right at the Full Moon and completed as Saturn entered Pisces, my 7th house.
I thought that was fun! I love when Spirit doesn’t skimp with the frills!
So far, it’s been lovely. It has been on my mother’s side, and everyone has been choosing to heal. They are all excited to release these wounds as a way to help themselves, to help me step into my power, and to assist the ancestral line, making ‘the journey easier for those who come after’ – which I found moving… especially as I never felt a deep connection to my “ancestors” before. I’m grateful this is changing.
HOWEVER! Speaking of change regarding to healing – unfortunately, my period pain came back in a BIG way this week. For those who don’t know, this has been something I’ve dealt with for many years – they’re essentially ‘attacks’ (best word I can come up with) lasting 1 hour where I purge everything in my body, and experience extreme heat and pain really suddenly. I used to brace to hold consciousness during it.
It's a bit of a bummer that it’s returned at this level, as it was a big moment for me, after a lot of work, that I once experienced a healing of this.
Yet I know there is a reason for everything, and Spirit is helping me understand. The Council of Light came through to share some information that I am still wrapping my brain around. And Ana – of Guided Knots fame – assisted me that same day with a beautiful healing in the Akash. As ever, I’m grateful to all the support from you sisters, both seen and unseen!
Another funny side-quest that opened that same day… was the arrival of The Goddess of Destruction and the Black Madonna into my experience.
On the mind’s level, you can imagine that I wasn’t thrilled to hear that they were there to destroy everything in my life that wasn’t authentic so that they could build my life anew on solid ground. Especially after spending much of the day on the bathroom floor. (I’ve had enough of solid grounds, thank you).
But on the soul level, I know I want this, and as scary as the name “Goddess of Destruction” can sound, she doesn’t feel scary.
In fact, that night, prior to their official Debut, I was finally feeling well enough to go outside and shake off some of my frustration and disappointment. While I walked in the dark, I felt for the first time that energy of the “Dark Mother”. And she held me in my exhaustion and grief. I felt safe in the dark-outside in a way I never have, and the colder air felt warmer and closer.
Not skimping any frills in my own theatrics, either, I had a lovely (rather public) cry beneath the just-waning Full Moon. And I’m not sure if any of you have ever felt this way… but on one level, I was quietly pleased to be wearing a long black skirt and shirt which moved with the breeze.
The mise en scene!!!! (Chef’s kiss).
While it took me the rest of the night to get fully back into alignment and acceptance, and to get the information I needed to from Spirit, I’m feeling peculiarly ‘ready’ and almosttttt excited for what’s to come. Even as they make no bones about it: Issues from childhood to come up. May need energetic healing support.
So, I can really only say to myself and to all of you: stay tuned for that…
Lots of love as always.
Erin x